Things are really foggy in my brain right now, and I know that if I were to try to explain my own feelings, it would be a jumbled mess. Rather than do that right now, for the whole world to read in misery, I’m just going to share an email I got from my aunt concerning my first cousin-once removed (Emmalee, my cousin’s baby…if that is a little more clear).
They took an echocardiogram yesterday on her heart, and 2 blood clots are on the right side of her heart. It also showed that the right side of her heart has diminished in strength and not working as well as it had after surgery. And a valve that they replaced on the left side is not working properly, causing her heart to not function well. Add to this, they did an EEG on her brain yesterday, and the results were that the left ventricle of the brain was collapsed and there were 2 other areas of the brain that showed trauma. Because of the brain trauma, a heart transplant is not an option. And she is too weak to go to surgery to attempt to remove the 2 blood clots in her heart. The have upped her blood thinner to attempt to dissolve the clots in the heart, but that could also cause them to just break away and float somewhere else.
This is definitely not news we had anticipated and it is a little hard to comprehend. But Ali and Jon asked for one more day to see what progress, if any, Emma might have. They took another EEG just a few moments ago and we will get the results of those in the morning…they are checking to make sure these results match with the ones we got yesterday. Then they will do another echocardiogram in the morning to check the heart. If the clots are still there, they will recommend that we remove Emma from her ECMO machine and let her go peacefully…she can’t survive with the heart this damaged.
Ali and Jon are processing all of this and know they have to make the hardest decision of their lives tomorrow. So I ask that you pray for clear direction for them; I’d also ask that you pray that maybe God would intervene and take Emma and then they wouldn’t have to make this decision; and of course, never quit asking for the miracle of her complete healing!!!
Tonight I’m reminded of Romans 8:26-27: “In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God’s will.”
I really have no idea what to pray tonight. I don’t think any of us do. So tonight I’m relying on the Spirit to pray for exactly what is needed for Emmalee, for Jon and Ali, for my Aunt Annie and Uncle Tim, for my extended family, and for myself. Please join me.
P.S. — i did end up leasing that apartment on Sunday, in case you were wondering. But right now i have bigger things on my mind, so ill give more updates on that at a later time.