Mark 12:30 (NIV)
Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength .’
There I was last night, just laying there wondering why I just wasn’t getting it anymore. And this dialogue just came into my head. (no, I’m not crazy hearing voices. lol.) I started thinking about this verse. I mean, I’ve heard this verse approximately 1.87 million times in my life…or close to it. I’ve even written about it on my xanga a time or two. So the chances of me getting anything out of it are slim to none. But I guess that slim chance happened last night. I began to realize that God was the first initiator of the checks & balances act. This verse says it all clearly.
“Why have I not been getting it lately, God? Like i did this summer…?” Because one of these checks was missing. The heart, my passion. So now I know you’re confused, and for the few of you that are still reading, let me explain. The heart -this is were the emotions are. But more than temporary emotion, its where passion originates. Passion beats out emotion every time. Passion endures while emotions fade. The mind -its where I know things. It is where reason and logic reside, where facts and figures get their meaning. The soul -it is what harbors the truth. It knows the difference between right and wrong, good or bad. It is the connection to another dimension. The part that tells me that there is something more to this life. The strength -this is your body, the actions that you produce with the body you are given. The ability to do something.
Okay so I know that for the most part, nothing is new. And maybe im just the last one to catch onto this concept, I dont know. But i was just thinking about why things dont seem the same as this summer, and I started going through this verse, since God said it was the number one commandment, and i realized that if i dont have one of these, then things are going to be all out of whack. If I dont have all of them, equally checking and balancing each other, then I can’t love God to my full potential! Woah. So i’m thinking, okay i know God is amazing, all powerful, ruler of all. I know He has changed my life, it wasnt just a summer fling. And i read the Word and I know all i’ve learned from it in the past. I know that He is unfathomable, uncontainable, indescribable. I’m doing the right things, and I’m striving to live like Christ, so its not like my “strength” aspect is weak. I’m doing what I need to do. And my soul is on the right track-I’m following God and am in connection with the truth, so its not that. So it has to be my heart. And this is where I have a hard time. So many times i confuse passion for emotions. Or vice versa. And so when my emotions fade, so does my heart a lot of times. Soul, mind, and strength without heart can produce legalism. Its not genuine. Its just going through the motions. But its not just the heart that can go wrong. Thats what is crazy about this…they really are checks and balances! If they are all lined up, They will all lead to the full potential of loving God. If I have passion, and I know all the facts, and I am connected to the truth, and whats right, but not doing anything about it, I’m not loving with the full potential. How can I love God if I am not showing it by my actions? How can i not be called a hypocrite? If i have passion and im connected with the truth and im doing right, but dont know anything, things can easily fade, become confusing, and produce doubt. And how can i really do the right things if I dont really have knowledge to know what to do? It leads to a weak faith, relying on the sway of emotion rather than concrete truths. And ultimately, if all the rest are in check except the soul, I could be a hard core believer…in the wrong god. I could have passion and know my facts and be living it out in my life, but if im not lined up with the truth in my soul, telling me right from wrong…i could be following the wrong god.
Wow. Things are coming alive again. It truly is about coming back to the heart of worship for me right now. The passion, enthusiasm, energy. I do think that its one of the first things to go when a person is tired. So its a goal of mine to become refreshed, to become re-energized. (i know, i should go to bed then, since its past midnight…i will, dont worry.) I am thankful for these checks and balances in my life. To become a hypocrite is to be missing this balance. To become a skeptic, jumping from one belief to another…is to be missing one of these checks. To be following the wrong god is to be out of balance. To be legalistic is to be unchecked and unbalanced. Its interesting…ive never thought of things like this before. May i be more aware of these checks and balances in my life and let God ultimately use them to refine me more and more to be like Him.