So I’m going to be honest, I would gladly take the easy way. Give me two options, I’m probably going to take the shortcut. Oddly enough, I’ve found myself being quite lazy thisweek. Thats not to say that I wasnt as hungry for God or that I wasnt seeing God’s hand work in my life…but I just became lazy. I wasnt seeking Him out, digging deeper into Him in order to be fed. I’d find myself too tired to read, and therefore I put off my devotions until the next day. But just as a human body can only feed off its stored body fat for so long, so a human soul can only feed off its previous spiritual nourishment for so long. Eventually the body or soul withers away. As I layed in bed tonight, I realized my laziness. I now see it as a hinderance to my spiritual walk that I need to deal with. It’s funny that right after I prayed that prayer, it was time to continue my reading in Matthew. I found myself in Matthew 7:13. God hit me in the first two verses (Isn’t that just like God?)
“Don’t look for shortcuts to God. The market is flooded with surefire, easygoing formulas for a successful life that can be practiced in your spare time. Don’t fall for that stuff, even though crowds of people do. The way to life—to God!—is vigorous and requires total attention.”
Wow. Okay, God…i hear you…loud and clear. The way of God isnt always going to be easy, It’s not always going to be pretty, and It’s not always going to make sense. But God calls us to walk that narrow road. I havent had trouble accepting the call to walk that road even when its hard or ugly…the problem i’ve run into is having the energy to walk, period. Well, maybe that isnt stated right. What I’m saying is this: I’m lazy, and a lot of times my pillow looks more glamorous than reading God’s word. A lot of times sitting in a comfortable chair, talking to good friends on the computer is easier than finding a quiet place and spending time with God. But God says that the way to life…the way to HIM, is vigorous and requires total attention. That means its going to be hard work. Persistently pursuing more of God. Passionately proding at the core of Who God Is. Consistently digging into Gods Word, spending time in prayer, reading books written by authors who are seeking after God in the same way, and simply just BEING WITH GOD. No, thats definitely not easy, its definitely going to take time. No shortcuts allowed.
Dont get me wrong, I’m hungry for God….but the hunger pangs haven’t seemed as intense lately as they once were. When all I wanted to do in my spare time was spend time with God. Which causes me to think, if I’m not as hungry anymore, have I been fed?…and if so, with what? Am I being nourished? Am I full? Leading me to the next point…If i havent been doing my devotions as I should, what I am being nourished with? Scary thought. Am I feeding myself pride in where Im at in life? Arrogance in being strong in my faith? Self-proclaimed righteousness? The pleasures of just having fun with friends? ….the thoughts are freaking me out just thinking about it. I feel like Stesha when she grabs her throat and starts hyperventilating because the thought is too traumatic to think about! I refuse to feed myself of these things, I want to become hungry again. Not full of myself, but full of God! I NEED to be hungry, because hunger produces a longing for more. And I want to long after more of God.
So this post full of ramblings from my mind has caused me to not only rethink my attitude of laziness, but has also caused me to rethink my hunger. Am I taking shortcuts? Relying on previous cookies of truth that I’ve gained? Or am I vigorously drawing near to God so that He will draw neer to me? Or am I even hungry? I hope so. But if not, why not? What am i being fed with?
No shortcuts, and a need for hunger. Something to think about.
Sorry about the unplanned, spontaneous, scatter-brained thoughts….its whats on my heart tonight.