Update on Brian

Just wanted to give a quick update on Brian. His last chemo treatment was on January 17. He felt pretty sick the day after treatment, but has felt progressively better since then. It’s odd, because normally it “hits” him 2-3 days after his treatment with an upset stomach, great fatigue, etc..but it really hit him on day 1 this time.

His next chemo treatment is on February 8 (the day before my birthday). We are also thinking we’ll do a PET scan in mid-late February. Keep us in your prayers for that…in the past few weeks he has started to get itchy again (symptom of Hodgkins) so obviously that freaks us out and makes our minds go crazy. Pray for peace, and also for answers at this next PET scan. We’ll let you know when that gets scheduled.

Thanks for the prayers and supporting us on this journey.

Cancer, and every other random thought.

Tonight my mom and I watched “Last Song” on Netflix. As soon as I saw it was based on a Nicholas Sparks book, I should have known that someone was going to die. SOMEONE ALWAYS DIES IN THOSE MOVIES! Ugh. Seriously.

So, you know, we get 3/4 through the movie and no one has died..I’m waiting for the boyfriend to get in a wreck or something and then, all of a sudden, (SPOILER ALERT) the dad has flippin’ cancer. Are you KIDDING me?? I should have known.

Why does everyone get cancer in movies these days. It’s like a blindside, every time! I don’t need to be reminded of the awful things that happen to people dealing with cancer. As if i don’t think about pain and death enough, let’s just roll it across the big screen for it to really sink in. Yep. Awesome.

Another thing…a former co-worker of mine just found out that his son has cancer. It has been incredibly interesting and heartbreaking watching them adjust to finding out the news. Christmas…then bone cancer only a few days later. How does someone respond to that? And then jump right into treatment. Wow. I think God blessed me by sparing me those moments of Brian’s story. Not that I would have backed away from the situation at hand, or that God couldn’t have gotten me through..because i know he would have…but I truly feel like God spared pieces of my heart by not having me around for those initial times of Brian’s diagnosis and treatment. I don’t mean that to sound bad, because I also really wish I could have been there to see him through the whole thing. That I could have been the girlfriend/wife holding him after his diagnosis…that I could have been the one he woke up to next to his bed after his transplants. That I could have been the one to stay with him in the Hope Lodge taking care of his every need while he was in isolation after his transplants. But….God always knows what is best…and maybe, just maybe, He spared me for that so that I could endure and be strong during this season. So that, when Brian gets tired or discouraged from this long road, he can look over at me and see me running the race…confident in him and in God’s ability to heal. I don’t know. just some random thoughts.

The whole death thing terrifies me. Is it bad that i think about it? I shouldn’t, i know….i know that cure rates are outstanding for lots of cancers. I know that God does miracles. I know that great advancements have happened in science and medicine. But i still think about it. And it terrifies me. I don’t know how God pulls people through those kinds of situations….i hope i never have to find out.

People think I am so strong, courageous, filled with faith…you name the adjective. But im not. I don’t feel like it. I don’t spend time in the Bible like I should. I don’t know what to pray or how to pray or what it even does, sometimes. I believe things that I’ve believe my whole life….but I wonder if those things are true, sometimes. Is God really strong when I am weak? Does he really give us new mercies every morning? Does he really provide all of our needs? Does he really give rest to the weary? Is he really my portion and supply? Or do I really want to go through situations that cause me to find out the answers.

Those are the things I battle every day. I’m glad people can find hope through our story..i’m glad they see Jesus…I’m glad that it can spur them on to be more like Jesus….but, just so everyone knows…I am so human and so jacked up, its not even funny.

..okay…i think thats all….

Happy 2012

It is a new year. And like everyone else, I want to be better. I read a blog yesterday that said “It is funny the feeling that January brings.  A feeling of discontentment that is motivated to change.” I guess I am with everyone else…I want to change. But the problem is…often…we want the result, but we’re not usually willing to put in the time or the effort or the intentionality to make it happen. I don’t know about you, but when the ball drops on New Year’s Eve, it’s not like a switch is flipped and suddenly i want to run a marathon and save every penny I earn to pay off debt.

That’s why, this year, my theme is “Willing & Obedient…”

…which comes from Isaiah 1:19-20, “‘If you are willing and obedient, you will eat the best from the land; but if you resist and rebel, you will be devoured by the sword.’ For the mouth of the LORD has spoken.” This is my friend/mentor, Randi’s, favorite verse. I never really understood why…i thought it sounded like a brutal, savage-like verse. That doesn’t make me feel warm, fuzzy feelings. But the more I’ve been thinking about it, the more I realize how true it is! When we rebel against God, we are eaten alive by the sword (the truth, the Word of God, the knowledge that we KNOW we are wrong). Sure, we may feel like we’re doing our own thing and it doesn’t matter if we go against God, but those actions will just cause us to feel more and more distant from God, more and more convicted, more and more miserable the farther we try to run. But when we willingly obey God, it is as if we’re living like kings!

Most of the time, I am able to get one of the two right…either willing or obedient. But it’s hard for me to get both right. Sometimes I’m willing..I desire change..I desire to be holy..but I never end up taking the steps to do so. Or sometimes I obey..I do what I know I’m supposed to do..but I’m definitely not happy about it! I’m pouting and muttering the whole time.

This year, I want to be willing AND obedient.

Of course, you’ve heard me say it a million times, one thing God has been working on me about for years is the way I honor Him with my body. The way I keep it healthy, the food I feed it, the ways I am active or inactive. This hasn’t changed. It is just one of many areas that I want God to help me become willing AND obedient.

And, just like everyone else, I have some goals for this year as well. They aren’t totally thought through at this point, but they are some things I’d like to work towards. I’ll have to be very intentional about these things, because I get distracted at the sight of the tiniest thing, and I’ll fall off track. But here are some goals for the year…

• Be disciplined in exercising & lose some weight (that’s everyone’s goal, right?!)
• Read the whole Bible.
• Start & stick with a “365 photo” project..taking a photo every day of the year (so far, im 0 for 4)
• Pay off $10,000 of my student loan
• Develop a better cleaning routine

So, there you go…some lofty goals….

But above all, this year I simply want to be WILLING & OBEDIENT.

Good news!!

Forgive me for not writing sooner…you know, life just happens and I forget about this blog. BUT…I did want to share that we went to the doctor on December 2 for Brian’s third round of treatment and for the results of his PET scan and the results showed that all of his cancerous lymph nodes except one were SIGNIFICANTLY smaller!!!! WOO HOOOO!!!! We’re so excited! God ROCKS!!!!

Trying to type on my phone …

I’m laying in bed reading a few blogs on my phone and I realized that I haven’t updated my own blog for a while now. So since I’m still wide awake (in anticipation for Thanksgiving, I’m sure), I thought I’d write a little update…on my phone. Which could prove to be very difficult with an on-screen keyboard. So if I say ‘thong’ instead of thing or ‘chilis’ instead of holiday, I do apologize.

Things have been much better since the last time I posted about coming down with the plague. Brian’s second round of treatments was on the 11th and it went smooth (minus the fact that our initial appointment was on the 10th, and after doing labs and being settled in our room for an hour and a half, the pharmacist came up to tell us that somehow they had failed to order the drug…uhhhh..what??) So we were rescheduled to the following day.

Since then, Brian has felt pretty good. He gets tired a lot faster these days, and has some discomfort in his stomach for about the first 10 days, but besides that, he is hanging in there. He’s a trooper.

The day after his chemo, we went hunting together, as he said he was feeling good enough and we were already planning to go on opening day of rifle season. This past weekend he stood up in his friend, Phil’s,  wedding. And our Sundays have been hectic, too. No wonder he’s exhausted!!! So thankful for the holiday vacation!

The doctors went ahead and scheduled Brians next PET scan for Nov. 30th!!! We will get the results on December 2. His itching has decreased significantly since we started chemo so we are so excited to see what is going on in his body!!
We will keep you posted.

Well, I suppose I should wrap this up. I’d say I did pretty good for typing this on my phone! Ill leave you with a few pictures I snapped on my phone of our recent activities.

Have a Happy Thanksgiving!

Moving & the plague

Well, we finally got everything moved over to our new apartment unit thanks to some great friends! I luckily got everything packed up late on Monday night, and some of Brian’s friends were here early the next day to get started. Some of my friends came shortly after and helped us move all of our stuff from one apartment unit to another unit. Luckily, our new unit is on the bottom floor so it was much easier moving in than it was moving out! I love our new apartment! Even though it is the exact same layout, there are a lot of little features that are much better than our old apartment…like darker carpet, a darker wood laminate in our kitchen, nicer floor tile, a ceiling fan in our dining room, a light in our pantry, lots more shelves and towel racks, and its on the ground floor! Oh, and brand new carpet, paint, and FRESH AIR!! PRAISE JESUS!!!! We were so thankful for our friends who gave their time and energy and muscles to help us move! We all went to Pizza Shoppe after we got most of it moved and we PIGGED OUT on some pizzas and diet cokes!

The night before we moved, and all day during the move, Brian had started coughing quite a bit (just like I had already been doing for a few days). By the time that night came, Brian had a splitting headache and “heavy lungs.” That morning I got up around 8 and was unpacking some things when my phone rang…it was Brian, who was just in the bedroom a few feet away. (Side note: the only other time Brian has called me from the other room was when he was coming down with his painful liver scare, right after we moved our stuff into our last apartment…apparently moving is not good for Brian). I answered the phone and Brian said “is it FREEZING in here!?!” I wasn’t cold at all, so I knew we were in trouble. Brian was burning up, but the thermometer didn’t show a temperature. He barely had a voice and he was aching all over. He had already called the doctors and they told him that they would be postponing his chemo treatment, but to still come in so they could figure out what was going on. I started ripping open boxes (cuz remember, we had JUST moved the day before!) and I found a sweatshirt and sweatpants for Brian..and I found enough clothes to piece myself together and we headed down to KU Med. We probably looked like a bunch of hobos. By the time we got into the doctors and they had run a few tests, he had a temperature of 102. He was freezing the whole time and had tons of layers on plus a couple of blankets.

They finally came to the conclusion that he had an upper-respiratory virus and that it would have to run it’s course. We were to come in every day until his fever broke. They gave him IV antibiotics and a prescription medication and after a few hours, we were sent home. By that night, Brian’s temperature had thankfully broken, but we still went into the doctor’s office for the next 2 days so he could get his IV antibiotics. On Friday, they discontinued his IV antibiotics because he was feeling better from his initial symptoms, but his mouth was starting to break out in some really big, painful canker sores and cold sores (probably fever blisters from his fever). The doctor prescribed him another drug for his mouth sores and I also picked up some Abreva and some other kinds of lip glosses to aid in healing this mouth sores.

Since Brian felt miserable from Wednesday through Sunday, and I felt like I was still fighting something until Friday night, we stayed home for the rest of the week and all of the weekend. I only ventured out a few times to get some groceries, medicines, or some much needed coffee and movies. We basically quarantined ourselves. Even though we felt crummy, Brian especially, it was honestly kinda nice to just be alone with each other and lounge and enjoy being together.

Brian’s mouth is starting to finally heal a bit and his swollen lips are slowly starting to get better. We both felt good enough to go back to work today, thankfully! I’m glad we got rid of the plague this time!! Now we just have to be extra protective and cautious of the germs and infections going around!! This was an unfortunate reminder of how weak Brian’s immune system can be while he is currently undergoing chemo.

Below is a picture of us on Thursday at the doctor’s office, in the waiting room. Every day we went in there, we had to wear these masks and go into a special quarantined room for sick cancer patients, so that we didn’t infect anyone else.  

Chemo is scheduled to either be Wednesday or Thursday of this week, pending on how Brian is feeling. We will keep you updated. As always, we appreciate your prayers!

PS- If you don’t have our new address and feel like you may need it, let me know and I’ll email it to you.

Recent events in photos

I’ve been meaning to post about some of our recent outtings, but I keep failing to find the time. So, since I’m procrastinating on getting things packed up for our apartment move, I thought this would be the PERFECT time to post some photos. I seem to get a lot done when I’m procrastinating on a big project. haha.

There are over 80 photos in the slideshow below, but here are the events it covers….

1. The bonfire night we had with our small group last Friday night. It was SO fun…I’m excited to do it again sometime!

2. The date we had a few weekends ago when we “explored Kansas City” again. Those are always a fun time! We went to a local KC coffee company’s factory, The Roasterie, and took a tour…followed by samples! Then we went to a yummy restaurant in the “West Bottoms” area of KC called “The Westside Local” where everything is made of local items…Brian had an assortment of “appetizers” as his meal, and I had an AMAZING chicken salad sandwhich and fries. It was GREAT! Then we went to The Roasterie Cafe to experience this coffee in all it’s glory…in a mint mocha! YUM!! Brian had a white chocolate macadamia nut mocha and it was delicious, too! Then we went to Lowes to scout out different types of woods for a possible making of a Long Bow (no pictures, sorry!), and finally we went to see the movie Contagion!

3. Lastly, some pictures from the pumpkin patch/apple orchard that we went to last Saturday…we found the perfect pumpkin and bought some DELICIOUS apple cider! (which, come to find out later, was not made from their own apples…it was from another orchard in KC…ugh! tricked!)

Here are all of the photos….

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Moving update

I’ve been waiting for a few things to be confirmed before I wrote this update, but now we’ve got a few more details nailed down. Let’s just say that it’s going to be a stressful week or two at the Lomas household!

The apartment guy finally came over to our place the other night to check out the condition of our place to see if we’d have to pay another security deposit on our next unit or if we’ve kept our place nice so we can just transfer the fees. It was nice to hear him say “wow, your place is really nice.” Not that I didn’t already know that…but it’s nice to hear that. I can only imagine the nasty apartments he’s seen…gross! Since we’ve kept our place in good condition, everything will transfer over to our new apartment and we won’t have to pay for new security deposits, etc. (which only makes sense since it’s not like we WANT to move..we’re doing it out of pure common sense for our health!) They want us to be able to move on November 1st so that our rent can just automatically start next month at our new place..the goal was to get us the keys a few days before so that we could get moved in..which was perfect because we’d have that whole weekend. The one bummer is that we’ll have to start another full year lease at this new unit, so we’ll be staying at this apartment complex for another full year.

A few days later the guy told us that they had found us an apartment that was only a few buildings from us and we’ll be in a bottom unit. Since the previous tenants had JUST moved out, they hadn’t even had a chance to go in and assess the place, so they told us the earliest we would get the keys would be Friday, but he would let us know on Monday when we would definitely be getting the keys. It just depended on how the new unit was left and if they’d have to do a lot of repairs before we could move in.

Well, Brian called them today and we found out that we won’t get our keys until next Tuesday, November 1. Boo!!! I was really hoping to get the keys this weekend so we would have all weekend to move in and get some people together to help us move. I’m really nervous about running Brian down right before his next treatment (which, did I mention was November 2???). Anyways..so now we don’t get the keys until November 1. UGH! We’ll still have the old place for a few days so we can get completely moved..but Im really wanting to be completely moved in by Tuesday night because once Brian’s treatments happen, we need to focus on that and that alone.

So, we’ll just say I’m a little stressed out. Luckily I still have tons of vacation time at work that I have to use by November 17, so I’ll be taking a few days off this week to pack, and definitely Tuesday/Wednesday of next week to move and then to unpack and go to Brian’s treatments. I was hoping that I’d have this Thursday and all weekend to slowly move boxes from here to there, and get as much of it done on my own as possible (while Brian was at work) so he didn’t get too worn out. But, now that we can’t move until Tuesday (the day before his treatments), we’ll have to get it all done that day…during the week while people are at work. Boo. Hopefully I can still get a few people to help during the day with boxes, and maybe later that night to help us move the big stuff. The good news is that we’re only moving a few buildings down…..at least, I’m going to tell myself that it’s good news.

Anyways…This seems like a silly request, cuz it’s not life or death…but could you just pray for some extra grace and endurance for me..for us…over the next week or so? Just to get everything packed and then to get everything moved next Tuesday…it’s the day before Brian’s next treatment and im worried he’s going to be worn out, and I’ve got a big freelance project that I need to get wrapped up soon and for some reason i’ve got a ton of projects that have landed on my plate this week at work as well. I don’t mean to complain… it’s just really got me stressed out. I know I just need to take it a day at a time…it just seems like I’ve got SO MUCH to do between now and then…I just dont know how it’s all going to get done, and how we’re going to manage to get through it without completely running Brian into the ground. Again, caregiver’s guilt, I suppose. But it’s my job to care for him..and being able to protect him from all of this strenuous work was one way I was trying to care for him…I was hoping to get most of it done on my own…but now that we have to move all in one day,  i’m just not sure if I’ll be able to protect him from much of it after all.

Anyways, id appreciate your prayers this week. Thanks.

Other Brian updates that I forgot…

A few things that I forgot to mention in my last update with Brian…

We checked with KU Cancer Center to see if we could do all of his lab work up here at one of the Kansas City Cancer Center clinics. KU and the KC Cancer Centers struck a deal a few months back that meant that they would now be working together and therefore making it easier for patients to get care. It’s good on paper, especially since we have a KC Cancer Center just a mile away from our apartment (and KU is about 30 minutes south of here). But, after calling KU today to ask about such deals, they told Brian that the patient has to be a pretty regular patient at both places for them to be able to work together. Since we’ve only been to the KC Cancer Center once for a second opinion, they don’t consider that to be enough to allow him to get his labs done up north here at the KC Cancer Center and go down to KU for treatments. Bummer.

Last week’s labs appointment was the fastest appointment I’ve ever been to. In fact, it took us twice as long to get down there and back as it did to wait in the waiting room and then get his blood drawn for labs. Usually we don’t wait for the lab results unless we’re there for a doctors appointment (and in that case, the labs are usually done by the time we’ve waited to see the doctor).

We got the lab results back and everything that was effected was pretty expected due to the treatment. Although, we were really surprised with the lymphocytes jumping up so high! That’s really good, and he hasn’t seen them be that high since pre-transplant!! We’re not quite sure why those were so high, but we’ll definitely be asking the doctor the next time we see him.

Here was Brian’s take on the lab results:

White blood count- 3.4 [normal 4.5-11] it has gone down a little which was expected but it’s not too bad.

Hemoglobin – 12.7 [normal 13.5-16.5] it’s low for normal people but it’s actually pretty good for me. Which is not expected, it should be going down (prolly will eventually but I’ve heard of people’s counts getting better on sgn-35.) [low numbers for this is what makes you tired.]

Platelet Count- 110 [normal 150-400] it has gone down a little which was expected but it’s not too bad.

Lymphocytes - 30 [24-44] this is a surprise!! This count hasn’t been this high for I don’t know how long [it's hovered around 15 for a long time]. So, this could be a really good thing. I think this is the first time it’s been in normal range since my transplant. Weird.

Absolute Neutrophil Count (ANC) – 2.05 [normal 1.8-7.0] it has gone down a little which was expected but it’s not too bad [it's previously been hovering around 5]. This is important in fighting infection.

AST – 75 [normal 7-40] This is a liver enzyme. It’s elevated probably cause my liver has to process the new meds. This is still an ok number though.

ALT- 87 [normal 7-56] Same as AST

We’ll let you know more when we have any other updates to share.

Week 6(ish) weigh in

So…I doubt any if you noticed, but last week (week 5) there was not a weight challenge update. As much as I could say that it was a mistake, it actually was not a mistake at all. You see, normally I’ll weigh myself on Monday morning and then text Andy to see if he’s weighed in or not. Last week, the routine was the same. Except that when I saw the scale read “184.4,” which was 1.4 pounds more than the week before, I wanted to hide. Sure, I could give every excuse in the book..”things have been crazy” or “it’s been a very stressful week” or “i’ve been emotional”…the truth is that I really just didn’t care about being healthy last week, i didn’t eat well, i didn’t work out…and…well, it showed on the scale. I thought “well, I wont mention it to Andy and just see if he remembers to text me his weight…but i’m not bringing it up this week.” Well, as I had figured, Andy didn’t remember to weigh in…and so, I just let things slide. I’d rather just be in the darkness. Well, my idea of working really hard to get back to my previous week’s weight didn’t really work…in fact, I really didn’t do much this week either. Luckily I didn’t gain anything, but i didnt lose either. The other day Andy brought up the fact that we had skipped this past week’s weigh in and that we’ll have to do a 2-week weigh in today. I’m glad that he brought it up, actually. I’m glad that I couldn’t stay hidden in darkness. Life is found in the light…truth is found in the light…transformation is found in the light. Lesson learned.

Andy:
Starting weight: 263
Last week’s weight: 257
This week’s loss: 0
This week’s percentage loss: 0%
Total percentage lost: 2.28%
Total weight loss: -6
Current Weight: 257

Angie:
Starting weight: 188.8
Last week’s weight: 183.0
This week’s loss: +1.4
This week’s percentage loss: +.74%
Total percentage lost: 2.33%
Total weight loss: -4.4
Current Weight: 184.4